Today, my news feed was blowing up with the latest hot topic, the biggest problem attacking our country today, the number one concern on everyone's mind... leggings.
I hope you'll allow me to get on my highly hormonal-induced soap box for just a second, because reading what people wrote today, I wanted to cry. And ok, a lot makes me cry these days, but this probably wasn't for the reason that you think.
I have already written about modesty before (Here) so at the risk of sounding redundant, I just think I should make it clear what side I am on here. I dress modestly. I am an endowed member of the church, and happily so. I respect my husband more than anyone else on earth, and would never want to make anyone uncomfortable.
But really? Is our biggest concern really leggings?
Let me back up a little. Because a few months ago, as you all well know, I found out I was pregnant. It didn't take long for jeans, even my biggest jeans, to get just insanely uncomfortable. I am always uncomfortable pregnant. Somehow I wake up in my nice cozy bed in the morning and feel like I spent the night sleeping on cinderblocks.
Then one day, a few months in, I discovered leggings. I was walking through Kohls when I noticed a mysterious light shining a few racks over. I walked slowly toward the ethereal glow and began to hear the distant sounds of angels singing. There they were: cheap, thick, and with a beautiful, forgiving elastic waistband. I tried them on and am not ashamed to say my eyes filled with tears. Oh, sweet comfort! Maybe this pregnancy wouldn't be so bad after all.
There was a definite change in my mood after leggings came into my life. I was a nicer person. My husband and dog stopped looking scared when I entered the room. And there were more benefits to leggings than just my comfort: they tucked easily into boots, they matched just about everything, and a catchy song would start playing whenever I entered a room. I finally had my own theme song!
Ok, it was mostly about my comfort. But is that so wrong?
But in the back of my mind, I always had that concern when I wore them: are people going to look at me weird? Will they think I'm being immodest?
And here's the crazy thing: I didn't think I was dressing immodest. They cover my garments, they are a thicker material, and I only wore longer shirts with them. I felt comfortable, that is until I got strange stares from anyone else.
I got a calling in the Young Women a few months ago, and I have been surprised to find that one of my biggest challenges isn't getting the girls to come to church, or the way they dress or behave. It's getting them to feel welcome at church, and to treat others in a way that makes them feel welcome. Which brings me to, what I feel, is the actual issue involving leggings: does it really matter?
I apologize that I have to be vague with this example, but I had an experience a few years back where a sweet young girl was asked to cover up because she wasn't dressed appropriately. This girl wasn't a member of the church, but was at a church activity and the straps of her dress walked a thin line between tank top and short sleeve. Apparently, she was making the other girls feel uncomfortable.
And here's the thing: I get it. She was informed beforehand what the dress code was. She made the choice to wear something that she knew she might have to change out of. But the look on her face for the rest of the night broke my heart. All I could think was, was it really worth it?
And that brings us back to leggings. I know that, for some reason, they are controversial. I can't tell you how many times I've heard the words "Leggings aren't pants." But I don't feel that they are immodest. I don't feel that any girl who wears leggings is lazy, or begging for attention. I don't feel that they are a threat to our national security. And I certainly don't think they are worth making someone feel out of place or unwelcome.
Yes, as members of the LDS church we believe in dressing modestly. But we also believe in treating others with kindness, and I would much rather someone showed up to church in leggings than didn't show up at all.
I think we all need to stop judging each other, and stop worrying so much about whether or not they are dressed to the absolute highest standard of modesty one can obtain. We are all trying our hardest. And for what it's worth, I bought my first pair of maternity jeans today, and once again the heavens opened up and the angels sang and I teared up from comfort. So if nothing else, we can all rest easy knowing I am one less troubled soul stuffed into a pair of Satan's leggings.